I have a have time dropping the f-bomb (and obviously I mean fiancé)! I always thought I would relish in the days of fiancé-ness but now that I’m here I feel pretentious whenever I say it. Usually I can avoid it by simply saying “Mr. Gloss” rather than ‘my fiance’ but for people who don’t know his name it is hard to avoid! Mostly this happens in work/elevator conversations, when discussing weekend plans, etc. with coworkers who may not know my fiancé’s name. Before I would say ‘Oh, my boyfriend and I are going to do so and so this weekend’, and now I have to replace that word with fiancé. Or during introductions – I can’t say, this is my boyfriend Mr. Gloss, and I avoid the f-bomb like it’s the plague, so I say, “This is…..Mr. Gloss” usually with an awkward pause to replace where I avoided saying 'my fiance'.
It’s absolutely not a commitment issue, and I am very excited to be able to say “My husband”, I just have a huge problem saying fiancé.
Has this happened to anyone else?
6 comments:
I hated saying fiance. Avoided it like the plague, used partner, other half etc etc. I felt that by using it I was trying to announce I was engaged to elicit a response, which I wasn't. So completely understand! However I do love saying husband...
Yes! I'm so glad other people feel the same way. You were right when you said you felt pretentious...that's exactly how I feel. I also can't help but remember that Seinfeld episode when Elaine and Jerry are at a party and Elaine's talking to this really annoying lady who keeps saying "I have lost my fiance!" in this very pompous voice (then Elaine says "maybe the dingo ate your baby"). So, yeah...I totally agree with you :)
I haven't heard of this issue before...When are you scheduled to get married?
I totally hate saying fiance, it just seems like such a cold distant word, I feel like it doesn't even begin to explain your relationship. I feel ya sister.
I love saying fiance, I think because "boyfriend" always sounded like less than we were. Fiance is more serious, I don't feel like the person is sizing up whether or not we'll make it or how long we've been together. I just feel like it fits what we are. I'll love saying husband too, I'm sure, but fiance reminds me that we're getting married and that excites me.
I'm not engaged yet, but when I do I plan on saying 'betrothed' just to mess with people. Who says we have to follow the french, anyway?
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